Tuesday, January 29, 2013

It all starts with a simple habit - Responsibility

Couple weeks ago on a Sunday Catherine tag me on her facebook post "have you done your homework", this was exactly how I felt at that moment... ...

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Ok truth to be told, I actually KNOW that DinoBoy has some school work to be done.  I did ask him after dinner on that Friday & a few occasions on the following Saturday which he replied "Oh ya!  Have!  I'll show you later.", and "later" never materialized.  I was prepared to let him go to school the next day with his home work not done and face the punishment from the teacher.  However, Catherine's message made me hopping mad that I just couldn't keep quiet about it.  He got an earful from me for full 10 minutes and after that I told him that I will not be helping with this piece of home work.

This homework is actually a cut out prize ribbon which he is suppose to put his photo, write his name and birth date on it plus decorating it, I guess its going up on the class' wall for some purpose.  I told him that I do not have time to go to the nearby mall to print just ONE photo for him, he just have to find a way to do his homework.  Either he do not hand the work in the next day or he do it without any photo.  He was sad... then he said teacher told the class that they can draw a picture of themselves if they do not have photo.  I gave him a cold shoulder, told him to solve the problem himself.

So he took a piece of paper and start to work on it.  He drew, he cut out, he ran to the craft boxes and grabbed the glue to stick the self portrait onto the ribbon.  Wrote his name & birth date then ran back to the craft boxes to grab some small pom-pom balls, stars & flowers to decorate the ribbon.  I must say, he did a good job BUT i was so fuming mad that I forgot to take a photo of it.  After he's done, he show the finished piece of work to me with a proud look on his face.  I was beaming all over inside me and I am really proud of him for trying his best to do it instead of giving up or worst by breaking down into tears and demanding me to help him finish the work.  I showered him with a lot of praises for a job well done.

Then I explained to him the rationale behind my firm stand of not helping him to finish this piece of home work.  I told him clearly that he has to be responsible for his things, especially now that he is in primary school, it is different from child care centre where he can finish the school work the next day in school, in primary school he WILL be punished if he fail to finish and hand in his home work on time.  He must form a habit of keeping track of his things because I have many things to remember and some times things will slip my mind.  And if he does not pay attention to his things/work he will be the one facing the music from the teachers, not me or anyone else.  I was not sure if he understands what I am trying to put across and teach him but I left him with his solemn face, deep in thoughts.

The next day and the following few days, the minute he steps into the house he will take out his student handbook & yellow file to let me go through.  Well, apparently he remember the things I told him yesterday.  Till today he has been doing a great job in keep tracking of his things, some times we will talk about the home work he have and finished in student care while walking back home from school.

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It may seems cruel and unloving initially when I ditched him with his unfinished home work, but I feel that I must let him see the big picture and the seriousness of the issue.   After all he is the one attending school, not me, if I were to continue to help him remember things or check on his stuffs every time, he will grow to rely on me more and more.  Eventually he will not be bothered to remember things, this is not how I want things to turn out.  Looking at this issue from another angle and treating this as a life lesson I would have taught already him something valuable, something call RESPONSIBILITY.

For with responsibility comes a string of other things.  You will feel the need to take charge of your life, to become some one who is able to make the right decisions, to do the right things so that you can pursue your dreams and hopefully become some one who makes a difference in some people's life.  

This, is what we want DinoBoy to achieve or hope that he will achieve in the future.  

This, is how we hope our teachings will mould him to be a better person.

~ ~ ~

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MummyMOO

8 comments:

  1. Well said and well done about the responsibility. Something I am still instilling in my children. Whoever says its easy to be a parent? It's not and I agree, sometimes we have to teach the hard way and it doesn't mean we love them any lesser. :)

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    1. Those that say being a parent is easy peasy must have outsourced most of the tasks.

      Hard way, cruel way, loveless way... it all wrench the parent's heart when they have to go into that direction to teach their child a lesson.

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  2. Never easy to be a parent. Now I know what my Mum means when she says I gave her a lot of problems, because I just refuse to listen!

    Karma, lor.

    It's good that Z learnt from that one mistake, or oversight. Now it makes him better prepared, and he knows that he should never repeat it again because in the end - he will also suffer from trying to complete the task, and making Mummy upset.

    I will also scold when I think it's necessary. Good thing is - and I hope it will stay that way - is when I do, C knows I mean business.

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    1. Some days he still forget but a gentle reminder sends him scurrying for his bag hahah~

      Remind and remind C again why u need to scold him hahaha~

      Frankly I think there are basic rules that the kids should live by. No rules = chaos = headache & heartache for parents.

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  3. I agree that it is very important that a child learns about responsibility when they are young. IT is not an easy lesson but if well though they will remember it for life.

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    1. Yes but then again still need some guidance lest they walk off the road n venture into something negative.

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  4. Yes, teach all the good habits. Not easy to teach values such as responsibility. Currently, am starting with something small and easy, like teaching my little one the correct way to brush her teeth. She should be responsible for her own teeth. Previously, she just refuse to do so.

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    1. I feel that both habits & virtues goes hand in hand, they are related or inter-related in a way.

      Well, not that she is older she should be able to understand and follow your instruction.

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