Monday, October 1, 2012

A dejected spirit, a dishearten boy

How would you feel when your child sat down on the floor, hugged & buried his face on his knees and wailed loudly, crying his heart out?

I was caught off guard and my heart just broke into million pieces...

It was a trial class arranged by Alicia for her Home Learning group with a certain drama school and their Superheroes and their Dramatic Adventures he was in the happiest mood when we left, we know for sure that he will enjoy himself to the max.  Though it's a drop off 2.5 hours class we can request to sit in just to observe, we choose to leave since we are sure DinoEgg will be ok and now that he is older he will be able to describe to us what they do during the class or tell us whether the class is enjoyable or not etc.

Never did we know that 2 hours later his mood changed drastically.

We went back early, wanting to catch a glimpse of the class activities before it ended.  I took a peep expecting to see DinoEgg laughing and enjoying himself, instead I saw him with a sad face sitting at the side facing the wall while the rest of the class are having fun.  The person in charge G was with him, I thought perhaps he has misbehaved or he is unable to catch up with the class activities.  I entered the room just in time to see him turned around, grabbed his bag and walked out of the room.  He did not even acknowledge me when he walked passed me to open the door, he simply just said "I am not a cheater!  I do not like this class any more!" before stomping out.

I looked at G who gave me the same puzzled look, 5mins ago she was outside the classroom peeping in when she noticed that DinoEgg was upset hence she came in to find out what happened.  She explained to me that the teachers were hiding some eggs for the kids to find, the kids were suppose to cover their eyes, the teachers said "No cheating by peeping~", he did and some one called him cheater.  He couldn't take it and got upset.  

When I went out of the class room, he was sitting down putting on his socks & shoes, I asked him gently "what happened?", all he say is "They call me a cheater but I am not!" hugged his knees and cry.  My heart just went out with... he wouldn't even want a hug from me, he got up and insist on leaving the place immediately, repeating "I do not want to go back to the class again!"

We left, with a still sobbing DinoEgg and while riding down in the lift he calmed down a little bit, in his quivering voice and tear stained eyes, we got to know that it was actually one of the teacher who said that to him.  No wonder he was so affected!  Initially I thought he was over tired from the early rise from bed and the 2 hours of non stop running around & play at Polliwogs thus making him a little bit cranky.  I feel injustice and have to go back up to tell G about this so I marched right up again.  G was apologetic & upset, she says she will speak to the teacher after the class and call me again.  I waited for the rest of the day and no call from her, I thought perhaps she really did not seem as apologetic as she was earlier.

My little sensitive boy was very affected by the incident, he wasn't in his usual cheerful self, he only brightens up a little bit when we got him the Red Angry Bird lantern.  Even so, you can still sense a pang of sadness in his mood.  DinoPapa had a talk with him that evening, I do not know the whole conversation, I didn't even know he talked to DinoEgg till he told me after that.  DinoEgg seems to have let it go coz after that he was happily playing with the ipad, watching & laughing at the cartoon on tv. 

DinoPapa is clearly very upset and angry (can't blame him), he posted this on his FB;
"Learning should be fun and reinforced with positive methodology. If I know my son will be labelled as a cheater and left the class with a negative thought, I would not be sending him there even if you paid me a million. Shame on the educator whom conducted the class!"

I have my reservations on this incident because I was not there to witness the whole thing.  I do not know the tone of voice the teacher used when she said the sentence with the word "Cheater"; whether she said it jokingly, playfully or otherwise.  However, having worked with children during my younger days for a year plus in a children play school and a mother, I do know that I have to be more sensitive towards a child and be more careful with my choice of words.  An easy going child can be upset with certain words the next seconds no matter how harmless you think the word is.

G called me this afternoon and we talked for 5 minutes which I am not going into details.  I told her that I am not angry with the teacher nor the school, I am only upset that this unfortunate incident happened to us.  I hope the school and the teachers will learn from this incident and be more mindful with the kids in future.  

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  1. THE TEACHER called him a cheater? An adult?!!

    Shame on them for breaking his spirit, and shame on them for even calling themselves educators!

    Regardless of whether he did / did not peep, even adults would be more than upset if the term cheater was used liberally... more so to a young boy!

    1. You know DinoEgg is a tough boy, he has his fair share of being called names in school but he will fight back with angry words or seek his teacher's help. He will never break down and cry so sadly, sobbing and every thing.

  2. That must have really crushed him especially when it came from an adult. Hope Z's feeling better now.

    1. He's feeling ok now. I try not to talk about it pass few days, maybe I'll have a small talk with him soon to find out how he is handling it.

  3. Tsk tsk...these sort of words coming out from an educator is not really showing the professionalism lor.

    1. Ya Amie, and its a teacher from a prestigious drama school.

  4. The teacher might have been insensitive on her side since you mentioned he has always been a tough boy. Hope he is feeling better now.